Secrets

There used to be a way to eat sandwiches in the car without people looking at you while you were driving down the freeway. I am unable to currently recall the method for accomplishing this, but I am certain that it existed. Or, perhaps, I am just making it up. Or perhaps it was available when I was much too young to drive. It really makes little difference, because it is no longer necessary. The way people drive nowadays....is nowadays really a word? Or should it be a phrase? Now a Days. Sounds funny. I am fairly confidant that it is a colloquialism of some sort, and will not be found in a dictionary. although it might be. I like the word though. It kind of rolls off the brain like bacon grease down a pasta noodle. Some words would make good food I think. Not just Orange, although I will wager that eight out of every 10 people first think of orange when you mention it. Because it is a word that is also a food. Now there are many words that are foods, for example, eggs, chocolate, llama, hollistic actually is not one, but watermelon is. All of those words are also food. They are names of food, but names are words too. And name is also a word. But...Orange while a name of a food, is also a name of a word, so it does double duty, and more people would think of orange as a word that would be a food before they would think of Cheese, even though they both by the naming standard have equal merit. After all they have the same number of letters, and what could be more equal than that? (other than splenda?) But what about the other words those are the ones that I am thinking of. When somebody says they may have to "eat their words" what words would be tasty? Which words can you really sink your teeth into?

Obviously some words immediatly spring to mind. For example Bipartisan. While the definition is somewhat lackluster, and it is being hogged by pretensious know-it-alls, rather than being free for the common consumption. But ignoring the definition. Taking the words just by its sylabic merits. Roll it around in the mouth. Feel the texture, and inhale the bouquette. (which probably would have been better before we rolled it around, because nobody like saliva dripping over their bouquette....except maybe cows, but they seem to like Saliva dripping all over everything. Otherwise, they wouldn't keep bringing it back through the system. Well they might, but then we would all think they belonged to some kind of cult, and I personally prefer to imagine they enjoy the saliva and other gastric juices.) Which makes me wonder how they make artificial saliva. We dispense it occasionally, and I picture the production being interesting to the observer. (if only for 2 minutes or less) but kind of dry for the producers. Especially because my first picture is of a guy sitting on a bench spitting into a bottle. On the other hand, the other picture I know have is a guy holding a bottle under a cows mouth. Neither one of them seem to be the way I would prefer to make a living, but on the other hand, the pay would have to be pretty good. (because otherwise people would count sand for a living) and there would not be onerous responsibilities involved. So maybe it's not so bad. Again the spitting into the bottle would be pretty difficult, and would require a water stipend. But still, there are much worse ways to earn keep. Then again, if those were the production methods, then the labeling would be false. Because the bottle plainly say artificial saliva. (course maybe artificial is the spitters name. I had not thought of that option.) So the next question is what would the preferred ingredients for artificial saliva be? Water would probably be the base, but it is kind of runny for saliva. which is runny, but it's also oozy at the same time. Now that is a gourmet word. Ooozy. Although I think more of a salad course, than a main meal. It just has a certain piquant quality that I can imagine beeing served in higher end word establishments.
So we start with a base of water. And while the natural next ingrediant everyone is clamoring for would be anise, I am not going to include it in this recipe, because if I have learned anything in this life, it is that anything worth doing is worth making as difficult as possible. No if we are going to avoid easy saliva the next thing we need to add is definately cumin. Top it off with a dolop of tabasco sause. Bring to a boil, reduce. Add some chocolate syrup, and bang bobs your uncle. Because my uncles name was daniel.